Inspect Iraq, Don't Attack
War: Been there. Done that. Don't want it to happen again!
After graduating from a general surgical residency at Tripler Army Medical Center in 1968, I was promptly sent to Vietnam. I had read a lot about Vietnam and the war, watched the unfolding of the Tet offensive in February, 1968, and had taken care of hundreds of men who were injured in Vietnam and medevaced to us.
I went with a great deal of ambivalence. Since I was a surgeon and not "going into combat," I eased my mind by thinking that I would be helping those sick or injured -- not contributing to the carnage.
I was stationed on the Atlantic side of the Panama Canal Zone in 1963-64. A riot broke out against us because of our unwanted presence. Over six days I cared for nearly three hundred wounded and six killed.
Most of the injuries we caused ourselves using CS gas against the rioters. The winds brought the gas back on us almost as rapidly as the canisters exploded on "enemy" lines.
That experience did not prepare me for Vietnam.
Two stories will suffice to illustrate what I saw and experienced.
During one dust-off, 50 or 60 casualties were brought in. The injured were triaged: the expectant (those not expected to live whether treated or not) were moved into one part of our rather primitive hospital so that those with life-threatening but salvageable injuries could be rushed to the operating rooms.
This may sound heartless, and it felt that way many times, but the number of personnel, operating rooms (we only had four), supplies, etc. are limited, so the decision is made to treat those who have a chance.
When the chaos died down, I wandered among those who had been brought in dead. One very handsome black soldier had a relaxed look on his face. He appeared not to have any injuries. My curiosity led me to examine him.
To my surprise his arm showed a complete lack of rigor mortis. Then I lifted the helmet that had been placed over the top of his head. His skull bone and entire brain were missing. A "bouncing betty" (a booby-trap triggered by an unsuspecting person tripping a wire) had exploded and cleanly removed the top of his head.
During another dust-off, a 21 year old blond kid who was due to rotate within days was brought in. As I looked him over, I could find very little wrong with him except for a small bullet wound near his shin bone.
As I prepared to take him to the OR, he said, "Doc, I'm going to die." I assured him that that was not true -- and he died. Our resuscitative efforts were futile.
A few years later I lived in San Diego. Thoughts of Vietnam were always in the back of my mind (and still are), but stories of flashbacks meant nothing to me. I had never had one.
Then I attended a musical show called "Beehive." Six women with enormous 50s-style hairdos sang rock songs from the 50s and 60s. At the end of the first act they sang Sonny and Cher's "And the Beat Goes On."
As they sang, the song became more and more strident, militant and angry. I suddenly began seeing images of the injured and dead I had cared for. I completely broke down sobbing. I was watching the show with a Navy psychiatrist who helped me come back to a semblance of sanity. But I could not explain my reaction to him.
At the time I did not understand why after 12 years I had had such a flashback. Later I realized that the increasing rage of the song lanced the abscess of rage I had been harboring for all of those years.
For the first time rage came pouring out. Our government had destroyed an entire generation of young men, and for debatable reasons. Writing this takes me back and fills me again with intense sadness -- and anger.
Over the years I've felt that no surgeon should operate on another until the surgeon has experienced what a patient experiences. Such an experience might change bedside manner!
Similarly, for the past year or more I've been saying that NO person of whatever authority who has not experienced war should have the power to send anyone else into war unless there are very good reasons and then only as the last option.
Sadly, few of those pushing us toward disaster in Iraq have any experience of the military at all, let alone of the carnage of war.
Rumsfeld was in the Navy during peace time. The lone person who experienced combat, Colin Powell, seems to have sold out.
My prayer is, "O God, do not let it happen again."
Bruce S. Jarstfer, MD, San Antonio, TX
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